Ramadan is a time of quiet reflection, appreciation, gratitude and forgiveness. Until…
Iftar time! When all bets are off, and the rituals of breaking fast, brings out the wrongs in Ramadan. Here’s what you see around the Muslim community right around Maghrib and after… Hey, don’t get judgemental, ok? You’re only fasting during the day all those virtues of fasting don’t apply at night. Right?
- The Wolf Pack – Stomachs rumbling and throats parched, we haven’t eaten all day, which means that at the iftar table, we have the right to turn into a hungry pack of wolves. You may be waiting for the adhaan to go off, but your eyes are darting across the table, eyeing the innocent food plates as prey. Your highly sensitive sense of smell could sniff out the biggest samosa a mile away. One eye on the clock and the other on the food… tick tock, tick tock… it’s time to get downright vicious when it comes to chow time.
- Weight Gain Mystery – Overheard: “But I’ve been fasting ALL week… how could I have PUT ON 5 pounds??” Let me break it to you gently… it’s because you’re eating yourself into a coma at sunset! When the adhaan goes off and you start your marathon eat feat – stuffing down anything and absolutely everything you’ve been eyeing all day – THAT my friend, that’s why you’ve put on more weight this Ramadan!
- The Iftar Entitlement – There are two times in your existence that you will only care about yourself. Family, children, loved ones and all others will mean nothing, your only concern will be you and how you can get ahead. It’ll be on the day of judgement, and also at iftar time! We can practice patience all day, but when it’s time to eat, don’t expect courtesy from us! You’ll see the demure auntie’s elbow in to get the chicken from the biryani, and the brothers will roll their sleeves up and reach over for whatever they can grab. Doesn’t matter if we can finish what we took, doesn’t even matter if we LIKE what we just piled on our plate. As long as we got the biggest portion, mission accomplished.
- Clean up? What’s that? – The only cleaning up we know how to do is to clean off our plates. And we do that really well. Somehow after iftar, everything else just magically gets put away and the next day a fresh batch of food reappears! Isn’t that what the Ramadan fairies do?
- Packing in Before Praying – You’re gathering your things and getting ready to leave for ishaa prayer, but just as you pass the iftar table, your eye catches an unfinished plate of chicken, and you can’t possibly waste food during Ramadan! So as a good Muslim, it’s up to you to go and finish that food. While you’re eating away, you spot some pakoras that were left over. Well… gotta get to those too, and then there’s a little bit of dessert, and then back to the chicken, and before you know it, you’ve missed ishaa! Which is probably for the best, because you’re so full by now, there’s no way you can go into sujood!
Made it to the masjid? Well good for you! Don’t worry, you can leave right after eight rakahs and get back to all the leftovers.
Ramadan Mubarak everyone! Enjoy the feasting while you can!